The Hills Blog

In other news, go have a spy at these rugged manly boys:
http://www.reubenparis.com/hills/index.html

Get yourself some dark glasses and they’ll be that pretty all the time. Just like the lottery we’ve picked some winning numbers:

3 – is that really a scary face? Or are those come to bed eyes…? Don’t know what’s coming at you round the side of a ruck…
11 – I get all the iron I need from eating nails. Don’t get in my way.
12 – auditions now open for the part of “houseboy”…Mascara, check. Curls, check.
21 – Don’t even start. That’s what that face says to me…

And so many more. But quite a few missing, I can think of a few more who’d look good in black and white.

Sunday saw the ladies at home taking on Dundee Uni for the second time this season. Having taken valuable points off Royal High last week the girls are still very much in contention for the title, but can’t discount the smaller teams. With the luxury of subs(not just one…but 4, surely a record for Hill-Jills) this was the perfect chance to give everyone a run around and work on a few moves they’ve been polishing in training.

Good to see people down supporting, I don’t know if “crowd” is exactly the word, but there were a fair few around including the littlest lady fan in her very own quarters, little Miss Abby. The ladies were also looking very fetching back in quarters after a red on red strip clash with Dundee Uni, maybe after a decade of these red ones we’ll go back to the quarters too…

Sunday also saw the return of some handy players with Joanie back out of retirement(forever we’re hoping), Moggs starting on the wing in her comeback from injury, and Rachy Nic coming on at 9 in the second half.

The girls got off to a good start and looked dangerous throughout. It was very exciting, and I forget things when it’s exciting and I don’t have a match report or video to snaffle things from, so here are some potted highlights…

Rucking: we actually looked quite useful in the old ruck, which is quite unusual for HillJills, though I still don’t think anyone knows where the ball is in our rolling mauls, or which direction they’re facing…special mention to Susie Broon who smashed through a few rucks, and HRL who was strong as ever in the contact.

Fandabby running from both our wings Lizzie and Moggs, Lizzie trusting her pace to gas the uni-kids on the outside. And Moggs, flying down the wings, flying through a few tackles on the way to score two on her comeback- which is pretty close to my grand totally number of tries evereverever…I think I’ll come back as a show-pony, get me some glory…

Good work by Steph at 10, and Sarah Canada and Rhianne, our yoooof, in the centres getting the ball moving, making the most of our organisation and superior fitness.

Fifi and Sooooz put in some top tackles in open play, and Dundee Uni really couldn’t get anywhere. Good to see all the girls working as a team, a definite improvement from last season as the squad seems to have a bit more depth and confidence(deep as a puddle you might say, with a mighty 8/9 down at training…but everyone seems to be happier in what they’re doing).

Rachy Nic was back in the driving seat, organising the troops, good to see her back in the middle of the half-time team talk. She seems to see all sorts of things I don’t even notice, think I need to get my game face on…psych up. Maybe next week…

Anyways, well done to all the Laydeeeeees, after a wee smidge of deliberation, but as all agreed on the day, Chosen One (Lady Version) for the week was…..Miss Lindsey Smith. With some classic Bish-bash-bosh, Booooooooom! Sit down! boshing, some good running with the ball and in support, fandabby linking play with Lizzie on the wing, and three tries all to herself she couldn’t really be denied. Yay for Lindsey as the first Lady Chosen One.

The ladies have a wee break before their next game…but will keep updated, they really are worth a wee swatch on a Sunday afternoon.

Saturday saw Irvine welcomed to Glasgow for the second leg of what was quite a tight away fixture. Snow was forecast, and it was pretty chilly, but the pitch was looking good and the game went ahead. A reasonable home crowd was augmented by travelling support the likes of which we don’t often get at Hughenden…

We will set the scene, in this piece the part of WAG must be read in a South African accent for maximum effect:
(Based on a true story, some names may have been changed, no WAG or nice lady came to real harm. Contains mild peril)

3 helpful and lovely HillJills ladies were sat on a bench, layered up to the max, tea in hand, providing snappy banter and welcomes to all those coming to watch. The very reasonable entry rates are advertised on a big white board. Nearing kick off some ladies appeared. These were no ordinary ladies. They flounced round the corner and formed an offensive front, blond hair flapping in a wind tunnel effect, bling-adorned hands blinding us with sun-glare- luckily they were protected with their wrap-around sunglasses- hands very firmly outside their pockets.
The sunglasses were raised to the foreheads. They appeared confused.

Nice Lady: Have you come to watch? Are you students?
WAG: What is this? We do not pay!
Nice Lady: Err…it’s only £2 if you’re a student.
WAG: We do not pay, the club pays for us.
Nice Lady:…what club?
WAG: We are the wives and fiances, the club pays for us. (pays for you to do what…?)
WAG2: We will have to get someone. We do not pay.
WAG: This hasn’t happened before, it’s the first time I’VE had to pay to get in to a rugby game.

The nice ladies stood strong, and they largely paid up, one headstrong WAG fetching an Irvine bufty to pay her £2 entry. It seems it is an entirely different world in Irvine…consider a move boys, they may be near the bottom, but they will buy you a girlfriend.

That brightened my day.

And then to the game, very exciting it was too. An assortment of favourite events: Stuart Ross destroying their No7 in a lineout, Vinnies’s “Boooooom- sit down!” tackle on their porker No 8, the fighting bits- I like the fighting, as long as noone gets properly hurt…

Other notables- I think the front row stood out, they were strong and involved, and mobile in open play. Good bish-bash-bosh running from Vinnie and Dougie, good dynamic rucking from Dougie, lots of good running mauls, and Hazzy was impressive as ever getting the ball moving in the loose, he looks like he was a scrum-half in a former life, and very reliable in the line-out. Also tip-top was Rosey at 8 who stole a few at the lineout and worked hard in the contact. Stuart Ross was back on his tackling form of last season, the kind of tackles that get ooooohs and aaaaahs from the sidelines, making ladies swoon. Some good running from Ally J who looked switched on and keen for the ball. Good lines from RobbieAngelsChingMai who kept the Irvine oldies on the backfoot, and reliable kicking as ever from Gus, and then possibly Michael Martin who came on and showed a bit of spark at the back. On the whole the world disapproves of skinny jeans and pointy shoes, but he makes up for it with good positioning and a bit of creativity.

Thanks go out to the RNIB who kindly supplied a referee for the proeedings.

Lots more happened, an exciting fun-filled afternoon was had. Feel free to comment if you think someone deserves a mention. After having a wee spy at bits of the video Chosen One of the week is…dahdahdah….David Armstrong! He’s always reliable at scrumhalf, gets stuck in and makes things happen, keeping things flowing. I particularly enjoy the wee bouncybouncy thing he does at the back of a ruck deciding which way to go, like an excited little puppy.

C’est ca for this week, next week sees a trip to Ellon where the boys’ll hopefully keep their home-form going. There are unconfirmed reports that Captain Cammy may be back in the fold by next week, will be good to see him back on the pitch.

Oh yes, yes they are. Hillhead/Jordanhill proudly presents it’s Junior Girls section to the world. The girls have been training hard and learning the game for a few months with Lindsey Smith at the helm. It’s not easy starting a team from scratch on your own, so big-up-ma-homie-holler to Lindsey, good job.
The U18 girls took on a well drilled Cumnock side in a hard fought game on a freezing cold Sunday morning on the back pitches at Fortress Hughenden. The girls did well with some good skills on show, some great running, good defence under pressure towards the end and good offload play out of the tackle. The Cumnock girls superior game experience showed through in the end as they ran out winners with some relentless attacking play.
Thanks to Cumnock, the referee, and the vocal support who turned out in the Arctic conditions to support the team.
Well done to all the girls, we’ll keep you posted on future fixtures. Anyone interested (not exactly anyone…female and under 18 are pretty much non-negotiable) can come along to training on a Tuesday, 530-630 at Hughenden.

The boys hosted Livingston on 17th Jan, winning 36-10 . I was lost somewhere in an enormous pile of coursework so didn’t see the game, but am reliably informed Chris Tulloch played well and is Chosen One for the week. Otherwise the game wasn’t much to write home about…with my investigative reporter hat on I canvassed some analysts (of the entirely unprofessional variety) and general opinion was they look like they could be good, but need a bit more fire in them.
The 2’s are still doing well, and under the charge of the silver bullet Cahoon are well worth watching. The ladies had a fabulous Sunday beating Royal High in Edinburgh, so, Royal High, Done! Home and Away, go ladies! Some speedy blogger has beaten me to it with the details, none of which I knew anyway so it’s probably for the best.
Saturday night saw a good turn out to the club race night, good to see a varied crowd in parting with their cash, but there were still a lot of faces missing, get your behinds down to the club, bring anyone and everyone, there’s plenty fun to go round. Daddy-rosey put on a good show, entertaining the masses with back-to-front Bingo, and a hilarious game of Higher or Lower. Apparently Bruce Forsyth isn’t big outside of the UK, and “Shake your shammy” doesn’t translate well. Not even, surprisingly, if you say it LOUDLY and slooooooowwwwwwwllly into a microphone…the poor girl did admirably and lost out on the final card.
The bookies table of Gaffer, McMillan and Muzza were toe-tapping all night and did a grand job.
I personally won a grand total of £4 which I promptly lost on a lame camel. Here’s to fundraising, it’s like robbery, but in a fun way. A good stash of cash raised, but still not enough. Next up to add to the pot is: Hughenden’sgotstarsintheirxfactoreyesfameacademypopidoltalentextravaganza! which is open to all. We are the stuff of dreams. We know you’re all fabulous rugby players, and tip-top banter boys and girls, now show off your other talents…a number of high profile acts have already secured their spot on the playlist for the night.
Joe and Cammy were getting some unfortunately public practice in on the Kareoke with a 2009 take on Dr Jones, the Aqua(?) “Classic”. It is amazing how singing can be physically painful, it’s like your dying on the inside, but you just can’t tear yourself away from the horror. So get practicing, enter your act, and let’s party like it’s 1999!

Sunday saw the Hill ladies return to league action for the first time since November. Welcomed back into the squad were international try scorer Heather ‘the danger’s over there’ Lockhart fresh from her exploits with Scotland and Susie ‘it’s all about the averages’ Brown, returning to the Hills team after injury. Missing from the line up was Rebekah Sibnlar who will be sorely missed after returning to her native Australia to commence University. The ladies were looking to complete their first ever double victory against Royal high after winning the first game between the sides 24-12 at Hughenden back in October.

Hills lost the toss and were forced to play into the strong wind and heavy rain. Good work from the kick off allowed Irish squad member and Hills no.10 Julie Craig to put in a testing kick instantly pressuring the RHC full back. A fantastic chase and follow up tackle from Lizzy ‘Ferguson’ Willis saw the no. 15 spill the ball only for up to be scooped up by inside centre Johnson who dove over for the score in the corner. The wide angle proved a little tough for resident kicker and all round utility player Kerry Armstrong. 0-5.

Hills continued to pressure in what was a predictably forward orientated match and shared the majority of the possession in the first half. Good work including strong ball carries from Heather and hooker Kate ‘Wilko’ Wilkinson forced play deep into the home sides 22. No.8 Brown pressured well from the ruck and charged down and attempted clearance kick pouncing on the lose ball to extend the Hills lead to 10-0. Once again the wide angle would prove just too much for Armstrong.

Loss of this second score seemed to spur the home team into action, this was also assisted by the introduction of second row and Scotland Stalwart Lee Cockburn who shored up the scrum increasing the pressure on the Hills pack although the front row ‘dream team’ of Heather, Wilko and Lindsey ‘Smithers’ Smith held up well. Current Scotland Captain and RHC no.7 proved a constant thorn in the visitors’ side with her good work at the breakdown. This period of pressure was converted to points after Hills were slow to spot the lack of cover on the open side RHC no. 10 Tanya Griffith rounded the corner of the defence to draw her side back to within 5 points. Conversion missed. 5-10.

Into the second half, with both teams aware of the significance of the result, tempers became a little frayed. Second row Catherine managed to get into a ‘disagreement’ with the biggest member of the opposition but was swiftly informed by Armstrong (who appeared a little disappointed she hadn’t got into the ‘disagreement’ herself) that we ‘had her back’.

What followed was the best move of the game after the Hills pack finally managed to provide some clean ball for their back line. Scrum-half Caroline fed Craig who threw a delightful pass behind the centre pairing of Johnston and Boag to full back Belinski who was supported well by winger Sarah ‘Canada’ Toom. Good scramble defence saw the move halted but highlighted the work the back line has been putting in at training.

After a period where possession had swapped hands several times the visitors forced themselves into the opposition half and were awarded a penalty wide on the right on the 22m line. Up stepped Armstrong who confidently knocked the ball through the centre of the uprights putting the game beyond the reach of the home side. 5-13.

The last remaining minutes of the game were spent with both teams reduced to 14 players. The Hills player ‘taking one for the team’ was Smith who was punished for being offside after the team had previously been warned. Perhaps in the future she may think twice before going mountain climbing then launching herself onto an opposition 9.

Special mention of the day goes to Charlie Lewis who played her first game at back row. The former no.12 had a fantastic game on the flank, got involved in everything and proved a strong ball carrier. She was awarded player of the match for her efforts. Leading from the front as ever was Captain ‘danger’ Lockhart who was recognised by the opposition. The tee-totaler had to nominate someone to drink her pint for her so up stepped the youngster Boag.

The Ladies are back on home soil this Sunday with a fixture against Dundee University, ko.2pm.